And the Lord Remembered Jessica

Yes, God does answer prayers. It is not always the way we think it will be, and it may be a trial as we wait for our miracles. Yet, the end is always the same--God remembers us and he is so merciful!

I am going to Liberia next Saturday to pick up Diamond and Florence. I can't believe it, I'm still in shock. I feel like the days can not pass fast enough. But, I have plenty to do to help it pass!

The story goes as such:

Tuesday did not offer up the answer I was hoping for, forcing me, once again, to hope for a miracle the next day. Karen had said that she would explain my situation to the consular and ask if she thought that I could travel for my children's Dec. 18th appointment. I couldn't sleep all night, I hadn't eaten for several days. I felt like my ADD was taking over my brain. I had butterflies and couldn't sit still. Karen posted that morning that we could call her on her cell phone and talk to the kids at around 11 am. When I got through to Karen, she announced that the consular had told her to tell me go ahead and travel for the appointment. I was so happy I cried and cried. I couldn't believe that finally my prayers had been answered. The children and I immediately knelt down and said a prayer to thank Heavenly Father for his graciousness. Oakley sobbed, "I am finally going to have my brother." It was a beautiful moment in our family.

Following that, I called Cheryl at AFAA to tell her the good news. Once again, I started crying as I told her the good news. At first she was a little skeptical, but the conceded that if the consular had given the go ahead then I ought to go. She explained some paperwork issues and also told me that I am very likely going to have to pay the extra $685 to USCIS since Diamond and Florence are not siblings after all. This adoption is ending up being more expensive than I originally planned, but how can you really put a price tag on it? DNA test-$600, I-600-$685, plane tickets $5000, Diamond and Florence--priceless!!!

But, that was not the last of my wonderful day. I also got to speak on the phone with Diamond and Florence. It was so loud at the AFAA house, I could hear very little. Diamond was very shy and Florence spoke a little, but I had a hard time talking to her. I asked the questions and they just said "yes, yes" over and over and then kept saying, "I love you, Mommy!" It was so sweet. They wanted me to keep talking, but I couldn't hear anything and I didn't have a lot of minutes, so I finally ended up hanging up on them because they would put down the phone. It was sad to say good bye, but only 10 days until I get to kiss their sweet faces and hold them in my arms!

I have to say that as I look back on the last few weeks, I can now see God's hand. I knew that I eventually would understand, but it was still painful to go through everything that I did. I am now very thankful for the DNA test. If I had not had to go through it, I would never know the truth about my children. I would not be able to help them remember the truth when they got older. I would be confused when they told me they weren't brother and sister. Now I have the truth. Not only that, I am going to get to meet the birthmothers and the grandmother. That is very important to me, to get pictures, to ask questions, to be able to fill in some of the blanks for Diamond and Florence when they are older and want to know.

God also inspired me to get the flight on the 15th. Sharon and I originally reserved the flights together when we thought that the DNA tests would come back positive. Then I got all kinds of strange news about the hotels being full and the consular not accepting two appointments in the same day surfaced. I asked the travel agent to look for flights later in January. When she did that, she cancelled my flight on the 15th. I kept trying to tell myself that January was better and it would work out better that way, but I kept having this nagging feeling to ask for my flight back. The travel agent said she didn't think it was possible. I wasn't going to bother to ask a second time, but the thought would not leave me alone, so I shot off a quick email asking her to see if there was anything left. She was able to get me a flight going through London to Brussels and then on to Monrovia. I felt this huge relief. But, I had to buy the tickets last weekend, the day after I got the news that my DNA tests came back negative. I didn't know what to do. It seemed so unlikely that things would fall together as quickly as they did. I couldn't even call Cheryl to talk to her because she was flying home from Monrovia. I went ahead and booked the tickets. I knew the most I stood to lose was $75. To me it was worth the risk. I am so glad I listened to my gut (or God). It is going to be so wonderful to have the children home for Christmas and to be able to travel with another MUAA mother. This will be a Christmas to remember forever!

I have much to get ready to go. Brian just found out that his Master's Thesis is due the week after I get back. This really stresses him out because I will not be here to write it for him, like I usually do. But, really, how much can I write about the Nissen Fundiplication surgical procedure? Notta. I kind of don't think I could pull an A for him on that one. So he will stay home from work for a week to stay with the kids and write his Thesis. It worked out well because he is on his ER rotation that week and with that rotation he can make up the hours on weekends over the next few months. Everything is falling into place. I even went and bought little boy underwear for Diamond. So cute! I have all Christmas presents bought and the house decorated. I sent off for my visa yesterday and it should be back tomorrow.

There are still a lot of things that must fall into place once I get to Liberia. Things tend to be a little chaotic and disorganized there. I am interested to see what craziness arises for Sharon and I :)!