Brian and a few of his buddies from work decided to have a field trip to Herb Hillz to do the zipline course. His buddies didn't really want women and children along, but Brian and I are inseparable (when at all possible) on adventures. This time we decided to give the kids a little taste of crazy adventure as well. I mean, I gotta raise my kids right, you know? If they can't fly fearlessly through the air by the time they're teenagers, I believe I have failed as a mother.Herb Hillz was hilarious from the moment we arrived. First of all, what is this "z" at the end of Hillz. It reminds me of "grillz" or the Turn'n'Headz beauty salon in the ghetto in Clarksville. Which is fine, if you're part of that culture, but it seems a little bit of a stretch for Koreans to be doing the "hood" thing. But it is what it is and it is Herb Hillz--a theme park dedicated to the loveliness of herbs with a little ghetto culture mixed in. (I know, just try not to think too hard about it.)
When we arrived we waited to get tickets and got in line with other military families. This is where my funny little story about discounts for "adulterers" comes in. If you haven't read that, then scroll down to my blog entry entitled, English Translation FAIL Blog and read #5. That was so funny, I wanted to cry. The man didn't even notice that he had mixed up the word adult and adulterers and that they had serious differences in meaning. But anyway, there were 12 adulterers on our tour and we got a great discount because of it!! Who knew?
I love that we were up in the mountains, but still right next to high rise apartment buildings. This is pretty much how it is in Korea, especially in Daegu. There are a lot of people living on a very small penninsula. But, I must stay, it is still beautiful and the Koreans love and respect nature greatly. Every little plot of land in the city (and I even noticed one behind the commissary on base) is turned into a small garden for herbs and vegetables. They love to work the land and are very frugal. The next funny moment came when we got to the bathrooms. Usually in Korea, they delineate the men's and women's rooms by gender signs with circle and a cross or a circle and an arrow. But not here. It's important to show how it's done right if you're a man. No almost walking into the men's room here. No way, I took one look at that sign and thought, I can't get a nice arch on my stream when I go, that must not be the bathroom for me. . . I was curious how they would depict the women's stream pattern on the female latrine, but unfortunately no picture. Now that would have been hilarious!
Now, remember this is a theme park dedicated to nature and herbs for children. So you will understand my dismay (and subsequent peals of laughter) when I saw this little sculpture garden. Yes, that is a raging tiger chasing an unsuspecting set of lovers as they cry and scream for their lives. Oh, kids, look how sweet, those people are about to get mauled and torn to shreds. See Oakley, see Oakley scream!
This next one was even better (although my picture was somewhat cut off). There was a wild buck chasing a family. The husband is screaming, while the wife clings desperately to two small children as she flees. Okay, first of all, besides the buck that ran out of the forest in Georgia and put a three thousand dollar dent in the side of my van, what buck ever chases anyone? Those things are skiddish at best. But, second, what in the world is the message for children? Respect nature by recycling or wild animals might eat you? Be careful where you picnic? I mean, if this doesn't give kids nightmares, what will? Okay, maybe the herb garden theme. Having an herb garden for an amusement park theme is like getting underwear for Christmas? Terribly anticlimactic.
There was a class of 7th graders that kept following my kids around telling them they were beautiful. They would try to use their miniscule English vocabulary and then would giggle and run away. It really was so cute. My kids felt like celebrities, so I had to get a picture. The funniest part was that CPT Dorema, Brian's really good friend here, had to jump up and get in the picture with the middle schoolers. That's almost as weird as an herb garden amusement park.
Which brings me to the next hilarious thing, Chickenoke. You can see CPT Dorema holding one of these strange things. We kept seeing pictures of it and wondered, "Why the heck do they have a straw in a cup of chicken nuggets?" Don't they clog the straw when you suck? Or is there ketchup in the bottom and you can slurp up some ketchup and then hurry and pop a chicken bite in your mouth? No, as it turns out there is coca-cola in the bottom portion of the cup and a second cup is placed on top with nuggets. I mean, hello? Can anyone think of a better use of space than that?
I really giggled when I saw the word "romantic." We live in the wedding district and EVERYTHING around is romantic, but this is the first time I have ever considered herbs romantic. So, I made Brian do a little romantic dip in honor of romantic herbs everywhere. The Korean children clapped for us, it was obviously sooo romantic. Actually, I humiliated Brian in front of his tough Army buddies and he wouldn't come near me for awhile.
This was a fitness station in the "Romantic Herb Garden." (I know, romantic and invigorating, herbs are everything you've ever wanted.) So there was a funny picture of a woman who could do a back bend because of herbs, so Chloe decided to imitate it. But, in America, chocolate makes you capable of this, not lemongrass--okay, maybe that's just in my world. Once again, the Koreans all clapped and cheered. We were a real hit at the park, apparently.
We then came to the zipline course in the top of the trees. They suited us all up in harnesses, hard hats, zipline pulleys, etc. It was a lot like what we did in Puerto Rico when we when canyoneering. They had a single paragraph safety waiver that you had to sign. Basically it said, you know the risks and you can't sue--and in Korea, that is probably the truth. We did a quick trainup course and we were on our way.
My kids are just amazingly awesome. They are fearless and thrive on adventure. Now, it's true I have done adventurous stuff with them from childhood so that they will not let fear determine what they will and won't do in life. So, I knew they were tough, but this amazed me. They live for this stuff now. I, on the other hand, was a tad bit nervous. I am a little afraid of heights and the last zipline I did about made me pee my pants, and I might have, but it dropped 150 feet into a freezing cold river, so I wouldn't have know if I did anyway. This time, the ziplines were much more gradual and I actually had a blast. I could even look down and not have anxiety attacks! We really had a fantastic time.
The ziplines were all about 450 feet long and went over the top of the raging lion and all the people slurping coke and chicken. They would all look up and wave, like we had time or guts to wave back!
The end of the course had some ridiculous moments. This one was so hard. You had to swing on ropes about 5 to 6 feet and then pull yourself up to standing on this little rungs. I did it all with upper body strength (just call me Arnold), but the really long-legged men, just stepped rung to rung. I'm surprised they didn't pull a groin muscle!
This part was crazy. It was an air snowboard. It was actually fun, but getting onto it was a bit disconcerting.
When you watch the videos below, you can see the zipline bike that we had to ride over a rickety swinging bridge. That was by far the scariest part. For future reference, bikes and swinging bridges do not go well together. So the next time you come upon one of those set ups, just say no and keep walking.
Now, remember this is a theme park dedicated to nature and herbs for children. So you will understand my dismay (and subsequent peals of laughter) when I saw this little sculpture garden. Yes, that is a raging tiger chasing an unsuspecting set of lovers as they cry and scream for their lives. Oh, kids, look how sweet, those people are about to get mauled and torn to shreds. See Oakley, see Oakley scream!
This next one was even better (although my picture was somewhat cut off). There was a wild buck chasing a family. The husband is screaming, while the wife clings desperately to two small children as she flees. Okay, first of all, besides the buck that ran out of the forest in Georgia and put a three thousand dollar dent in the side of my van, what buck ever chases anyone? Those things are skiddish at best. But, second, what in the world is the message for children? Respect nature by recycling or wild animals might eat you? Be careful where you picnic? I mean, if this doesn't give kids nightmares, what will? Okay, maybe the herb garden theme. Having an herb garden for an amusement park theme is like getting underwear for Christmas? Terribly anticlimactic.
There was a class of 7th graders that kept following my kids around telling them they were beautiful. They would try to use their miniscule English vocabulary and then would giggle and run away. It really was so cute. My kids felt like celebrities, so I had to get a picture. The funniest part was that CPT Dorema, Brian's really good friend here, had to jump up and get in the picture with the middle schoolers. That's almost as weird as an herb garden amusement park.
Which brings me to the next hilarious thing, Chickenoke. You can see CPT Dorema holding one of these strange things. We kept seeing pictures of it and wondered, "Why the heck do they have a straw in a cup of chicken nuggets?" Don't they clog the straw when you suck? Or is there ketchup in the bottom and you can slurp up some ketchup and then hurry and pop a chicken bite in your mouth? No, as it turns out there is coca-cola in the bottom portion of the cup and a second cup is placed on top with nuggets. I mean, hello? Can anyone think of a better use of space than that?
I really giggled when I saw the word "romantic." We live in the wedding district and EVERYTHING around is romantic, but this is the first time I have ever considered herbs romantic. So, I made Brian do a little romantic dip in honor of romantic herbs everywhere. The Korean children clapped for us, it was obviously sooo romantic. Actually, I humiliated Brian in front of his tough Army buddies and he wouldn't come near me for awhile.
This was a fitness station in the "Romantic Herb Garden." (I know, romantic and invigorating, herbs are everything you've ever wanted.) So there was a funny picture of a woman who could do a back bend because of herbs, so Chloe decided to imitate it. But, in America, chocolate makes you capable of this, not lemongrass--okay, maybe that's just in my world. Once again, the Koreans all clapped and cheered. We were a real hit at the park, apparently.
We then came to the zipline course in the top of the trees. They suited us all up in harnesses, hard hats, zipline pulleys, etc. It was a lot like what we did in Puerto Rico when we when canyoneering. They had a single paragraph safety waiver that you had to sign. Basically it said, you know the risks and you can't sue--and in Korea, that is probably the truth. We did a quick trainup course and we were on our way.My kids are just amazingly awesome. They are fearless and thrive on adventure. Now, it's true I have done adventurous stuff with them from childhood so that they will not let fear determine what they will and won't do in life. So, I knew they were tough, but this amazed me. They live for this stuff now. I, on the other hand, was a tad bit nervous. I am a little afraid of heights and the last zipline I did about made me pee my pants, and I might have, but it dropped 150 feet into a freezing cold river, so I wouldn't have know if I did anyway. This time, the ziplines were much more gradual and I actually had a blast. I could even look down and not have anxiety attacks! We really had a fantastic time.
The ziplines were all about 450 feet long and went over the top of the raging lion and all the people slurping coke and chicken. They would all look up and wave, like we had time or guts to wave back!
The end of the course had some ridiculous moments. This one was so hard. You had to swing on ropes about 5 to 6 feet and then pull yourself up to standing on this little rungs. I did it all with upper body strength (just call me Arnold), but the really long-legged men, just stepped rung to rung. I'm surprised they didn't pull a groin muscle!
This part was crazy. It was an air snowboard. It was actually fun, but getting onto it was a bit disconcerting.
When you watch the videos below, you can see the zipline bike that we had to ride over a rickety swinging bridge. That was by far the scariest part. For future reference, bikes and swinging bridges do not go well together. So the next time you come upon one of those set ups, just say no and keep walking.As we were leaving the park we encountered the situation below. We thought it really funny that they would stuff their kids into a giant plastic ball and try to get them to walk. This poor little girl just kept falling over and then trying to stand up and flopping on her face while the ball spun in circles. The parents were having a great time and were highly amused by it, however, the girl's face didn't seem to correspond to the parent's delight, that's for sure! But, then again, now that I'm a parent, that's maybe my preferrered form of entertainment as well. Come on, Sophia, I swear you're going to love this one!!
Yet, another fun adventure in Korea.
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